Jeff and Derek speed to West Valley, park at Cracker Barrel, and race across the parking lot, arriving at the meeting spot at 3:58. By 4:07, no one else has arrived.
"See, it was just a prank," said Jeff.
Suddenly, a door opens and a beautiful, petite woman emerges.
"Thanks for waiting for me, guys," she says. "I'm Alexa."
While stunned to actually see her, Jeff manages to quickly fire back, "We're Blake and Murphy."
Alexa laughs. Derek seethes internally that Jeff made the early impression.
"Wasn't sure you guys would show up. Now that I know you're here, let me get some passes so you can walk around with me backstage. I'll be right back."
Alexa goes back inside, and Jeff turns to his brother.
"Looks like your dreams are coming true,Der-dude," he says. "Want me to make up an excuse to leave so you can have her to yourself? Or should I stick around?"
Derek ponders. With Jeff gone, he'd have Alexa's full attention. He'd be the one charming her and making all the jokes. But on the other hand...Jeff just made it clear that he won't be competing for her affections. Keeping him around might provide a buffer against any nervousness or awkwardness. Maybe he could even talk Derek up and improve his chances of getting a second date, like Chris Jericho helping Kevin Owens win a championship.
IF YOU WANT JEFF TO BACK OFF AND WAIT AT CRACKER BARREL, GO TO PAGE 4
IF YOU WANT JEFF TO STICK AROUND AS YOUR WINGMAN, GO TO PAGE 5
Saturday, December 24, 2016
PAGE 4
"You'd really just take off and leave us alone?" Derek asked.
"Of course! But if you bump into Alicia Fox and she wants to meet a local guy, you'd better call me right away."
"Thanks, bro."
A minute later, Ms. Bliss returned. "I've got the passes!"
"While you were gone I got an emergency call, and I have to go," Jeff said. "But it was awesome to meet you."
"That's too bad. But the two of us can still have fun, right?" Alexa grabbed Derek's hand and pulled him into the building.
The next few hours were a bit of a blur for Derek. Alexa did most of the talking, giving Derek a behind-the-scenes tour, introducing him to other Superstars (many selfies were taken), and just talking about the business. Derek's shock eventually wore off, and he managed to carry on his end of the conversation without embarrassing himself. He'd have to think about it longer to decide for sure, but this had probably been the coolest thing that ever happened to him.
Around 6:30, Alexa told Derek it was time for her to get ready for the show, and she'd have to leave him--like, forever.
"I would totally go out with you again," she said. "But you know what the WWE lifestyle is like. I'm in a different town every night, that's why most wrestlers only have long-term relationships with other wrestlers. But I'd love to give you something to remember me by. Would you rather have a hug, or a kiss?"
"Can I have both?"
"Nice try, buddy."
"Murphy? I thought I was Blake."
"Ha! You guys are both hilarious. Seriously, though...you're going to have to pick just one."
Derek knew there were no bad choices here, but this still felt like the most important decision of his life.
IF YOU CHOOSE A HUG, GO TO PAGE 6
IF YOU CHOOSE A KISS, GO TO PAGE 7
"Of course! But if you bump into Alicia Fox and she wants to meet a local guy, you'd better call me right away."
"Thanks, bro."
A minute later, Ms. Bliss returned. "I've got the passes!"
"While you were gone I got an emergency call, and I have to go," Jeff said. "But it was awesome to meet you."
"That's too bad. But the two of us can still have fun, right?" Alexa grabbed Derek's hand and pulled him into the building.
The next few hours were a bit of a blur for Derek. Alexa did most of the talking, giving Derek a behind-the-scenes tour, introducing him to other Superstars (many selfies were taken), and just talking about the business. Derek's shock eventually wore off, and he managed to carry on his end of the conversation without embarrassing himself. He'd have to think about it longer to decide for sure, but this had probably been the coolest thing that ever happened to him.
Around 6:30, Alexa told Derek it was time for her to get ready for the show, and she'd have to leave him--like, forever.
"I would totally go out with you again," she said. "But you know what the WWE lifestyle is like. I'm in a different town every night, that's why most wrestlers only have long-term relationships with other wrestlers. But I'd love to give you something to remember me by. Would you rather have a hug, or a kiss?"
"Can I have both?"
"Nice try, buddy."
"Murphy? I thought I was Blake."
"Ha! You guys are both hilarious. Seriously, though...you're going to have to pick just one."
Derek knew there were no bad choices here, but this still felt like the most important decision of his life.
IF YOU CHOOSE A HUG, GO TO PAGE 6
IF YOU CHOOSE A KISS, GO TO PAGE 7
PAGE 7
"I'll take the kiss," Derek said, doing his best to keep his voice from squeaking.
"So you want me to give your mouth some pleasure, huh? Well, here's a free pass to the craft services table. Enjoy!"
Alexa skipped down the hallway and out of Derek's life forever. He made his way to the craft services area, showed his pass, and loaded up his plate. The food was really good, but Derek wasn't able to fully enjoy it because Byron Saxton kept trying to engage him in conversation.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS FREE LUNCH AT WORK. PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
"So you want me to give your mouth some pleasure, huh? Well, here's a free pass to the craft services table. Enjoy!"
Alexa skipped down the hallway and out of Derek's life forever. He made his way to the craft services area, showed his pass, and loaded up his plate. The food was really good, but Derek wasn't able to fully enjoy it because Byron Saxton kept trying to engage him in conversation.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS FREE LUNCH AT WORK. PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
PAGE 6
"How about a hug," Derek said.
"So you want me wrapped around your body, huh? Well, here's a free t-shirt!"
Alexa skipped away down the hallway and out of Derek's life forever.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS AN ALEXA BLISS T-SHIRT! PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
"So you want me wrapped around your body, huh? Well, here's a free t-shirt!"
Alexa skipped away down the hallway and out of Derek's life forever.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS AN ALEXA BLISS T-SHIRT! PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
PAGE 5
"I might be able to take her one-on-one, but I like my odds much better in a handicap match," said Derek. "Let's tag-team this."
Alexa returned with the passes, and led them on an exhilarating tour of the backstage area. She introduced them to the other Superstars they encountered as they wandered around, and all were gracious and took pictures with Jeff and Derek. Jeff took every chance he could to talk up Derek, but Alexa seemed content to talk to both guys at once rather than focusing attention on one or the other.
Around 6:30, Alexa said she had to get ready for the show.
"I've had fun, and I really like you guys," she said. "But we'll probably never see each other again. It's just the nature of the business. But I want to give you something to remember me by. If you could have a signed picture of me, would you prefer to see me all hot and sweaty? Or would you rather see my breasts and buns?"
"How about all of the above?" Derek asked.
"Nice try, buddy," she replied.
"No, I'm Wesley. He's Buddy."
"You guys are hilarious! Seriously, though, you can only choose one."
"You make the call, Blake," Jeff said.
IF YOU WANT TO SEE ALEXA ALL HOT AND SWEATY, GO TO PAGE 8
IF YOU WANT TO SEE ALEXA'S BREASTS AND BUNS, GO TO PAGE 9
Alexa returned with the passes, and led them on an exhilarating tour of the backstage area. She introduced them to the other Superstars they encountered as they wandered around, and all were gracious and took pictures with Jeff and Derek. Jeff took every chance he could to talk up Derek, but Alexa seemed content to talk to both guys at once rather than focusing attention on one or the other.
Around 6:30, Alexa said she had to get ready for the show.
"I've had fun, and I really like you guys," she said. "But we'll probably never see each other again. It's just the nature of the business. But I want to give you something to remember me by. If you could have a signed picture of me, would you prefer to see me all hot and sweaty? Or would you rather see my breasts and buns?"
"How about all of the above?" Derek asked.
"Nice try, buddy," she replied.
"No, I'm Wesley. He's Buddy."
"You guys are hilarious! Seriously, though, you can only choose one."
"You make the call, Blake," Jeff said.
IF YOU WANT TO SEE ALEXA ALL HOT AND SWEATY, GO TO PAGE 8
IF YOU WANT TO SEE ALEXA'S BREASTS AND BUNS, GO TO PAGE 9
PAGE 8
"We would LOVE to see you all hot and sweaty," Derek said, trying unsuccessfully not to sound like a creep.
"Good choice! Here's two tickets to tonight's show. I'm bound to work up a sweat while I kick the crap out of Dana Brooke. Cheer loud for me!"
Alexa skipped away down the hall, and out of the brothers' lives forever.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS TICKETS TO THE WWE LIVE EVENT AT THE MAVERIK CENTER FEBRUARY 4. PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
"Good choice! Here's two tickets to tonight's show. I'm bound to work up a sweat while I kick the crap out of Dana Brooke. Cheer loud for me!"
Alexa skipped away down the hall, and out of the brothers' lives forever.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS TICKETS TO THE WWE LIVE EVENT AT THE MAVERIK CENTER FEBRUARY 4. PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
PAGE 9
"I'm not sure how you'll get them all in one photo," Derek said, "but how can we turn down the chance to see your breasts and buns?"
"Follow me, boys," Alexa purred.
She led them to a large open room at the end of the hallway.
"Here's craft services. They've got some excellent chicken sandwiches. Enjoy!"
Alexa skipped away back down the hallway and out of the brothers' lives forever. They loaded their plates with buns, breasts, and more. Byron Saxton invited them to sit at his table, but Derek and Jeff pretended they didn't hear him.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS GOING OUT TO DINNER WITH JEFF. PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
"Follow me, boys," Alexa purred.
She led them to a large open room at the end of the hallway.
"Here's craft services. They've got some excellent chicken sandwiches. Enjoy!"
Alexa skipped away back down the hallway and out of the brothers' lives forever. They loaded their plates with buns, breasts, and more. Byron Saxton invited them to sit at his table, but Derek and Jeff pretended they didn't hear him.
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT IS GOING OUT TO DINNER WITH JEFF. PLEASE COPY THIS PAGE'S URL AND EMAIL IT TO JEFF TO CLAIM YOUR GIFT.
PAGE 2
YOU IDIOT! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE? JUST GO TO THE MAVERIK CENTER!
THE MAVERIK CENTER AWAITS! GO TO PAGE 3
THE MAVERIK CENTER AWAITS! GO TO PAGE 3
PAGE 1
Derek and Jeff were hanging out at Derek's apartment one Saturday afternoon, watching TV and eating pizza. A WWE live event was happening that night at the Maverik Center, and they were debating if they wanted to go hang around the venue to try to see the Superstars as they arrived.
"Hey," Derek said, "I wonder if any of them are on Tinder?"
The two brothers opened their apps and started swiping furiously. Jeff quickly ran out of women to view on Tinder and switched to Bumble. After swiping past three or four women, he stopped, momentarily stunned.
"Open Bumble," he ordered his younger brother. Derek swiped right on one woman, and then he saw her too: Alexa Bliss. On the count of three, they both swiped right...and shockingly, both instantly had a new match!
Assuming it must be a fake account, they laughed about it and put their phones down. But less than five minutes later, both received the same message from their new match: "Want to hang out this afternoon?"
After some deliberation, Derek and Jeff both replied. "Of course! But you sent the same message to my brother. How many dudes will you be hanging out with?"
"Just you two. Meet me at the Maverik Center service ramp at 4:00."
It was 3:30 already. To make it by 4:00, they'd have to leave right away.
"Should we even bother?" Jeff asked. "It's probably just someone playing a prank."
"But what if it's not?" Derek replied.
IF YOU DECIDE TO STAY HOME AND KEEP WATCHING TV, GO TO PAGE 2
IF YOU DECIDE TO GO TO THE MAVERIK CENTER, GO TO PAGE 3
"Hey," Derek said, "I wonder if any of them are on Tinder?"
The two brothers opened their apps and started swiping furiously. Jeff quickly ran out of women to view on Tinder and switched to Bumble. After swiping past three or four women, he stopped, momentarily stunned.
"Open Bumble," he ordered his younger brother. Derek swiped right on one woman, and then he saw her too: Alexa Bliss. On the count of three, they both swiped right...and shockingly, both instantly had a new match!
Assuming it must be a fake account, they laughed about it and put their phones down. But less than five minutes later, both received the same message from their new match: "Want to hang out this afternoon?"
After some deliberation, Derek and Jeff both replied. "Of course! But you sent the same message to my brother. How many dudes will you be hanging out with?"
"Just you two. Meet me at the Maverik Center service ramp at 4:00."
It was 3:30 already. To make it by 4:00, they'd have to leave right away.
"Should we even bother?" Jeff asked. "It's probably just someone playing a prank."
"But what if it's not?" Derek replied.
IF YOU DECIDE TO STAY HOME AND KEEP WATCHING TV, GO TO PAGE 2
IF YOU DECIDE TO GO TO THE MAVERIK CENTER, GO TO PAGE 3
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)